These things do happen, you know. Just when
you think, "Oh God, can GH possibly get anymore boring?" something interesting
comes along. Oh sure, we still have some of the stupid ish hanging around but
slowly and surely, there's beginning to be less of it.
So, speaking of stupid, let's line up a few
people for a few smacks across the face before we get to the good stuff. How
about Michael? I tell ya, the line of folks that want to pop him upside the
head has to be as long as the yellow brick road by now. The cops have some
nobody suspect in the dancer attacks but have to release him because they have
no case. So what does the entitled first brat do? He buys a gun and the next
thing we know, old what's-his-name is lying facedown with a bullet in his
chest and Dumb-Dumb is standing over him with aforementioned gun. I swear up
and down, that kid is a damn idiot. Never mind if he shot the guy or not. This
is what happens when you start screaming before you get your story straight.
And here come Dante and Jason, ready to protect Michael again and keep him
from being sent back to that place that shall not be named, lest we all be
drunk by the show's intro. GH really needs to come up with a better story,
we've seen this one about eight thousand times already. The nerves, it does
grate.
You can have a brooding, angry young man who
is feeling vengeful after being hurt and all he does is annoy the hell out of
you. Then you can have a brooding, angry young man who is feeling vengeful
after being hurt and end up getting your socks knocked off. Michael is
Michael, he'll always be an irritant to me. But Johnny, on the other hand...
Sonny decided to take it upon himself to reveal Johnny's true parentage to
him: Gino was his father and Claudia, the woman he always believed to be his
sister, was actually his mother. I'm not even going to ask why Sonny decided
to open this Pandora's box now nor do I really want to know what Sonny could
possibly hope to accomplish with this attempt to turn Johnny's world upside
down. What's done is done, and now Johnny has truly had his world rocked with
this revelation. I have to wonder why learning that Claudia was really
Johnny's mother is happening now, after the character of Claudia is out of the
picture. It makes sense, now that you think about it. Her love for him was way
too intense and protective to just be sisterly. Oh she was like eight when she
had him, but never you mind. What it all really adds up to are two things:
One, we're getting a mob war because Johnny is totally not playing. And two,
it makes for some fabulous scenes for Brandon Barash.
What the eff though? Did Anthony pimp out his
daughter for blackmail money, or whatever it was? And now Anthony is married
to Tracy, who has Gino's money. He says he's doing it all for Johnny, but if
Johnny is Gino's kid, how big of a slice of the pie are we talking for his
true heir? Dare I ask what Anthony's real main objective is?
Then we have Patrick, who found out about
Robin's dilemma from the resident motormouth. It's not the fact that Patrick
now knows the truth because he needed to be told. It's the fact that Elizabeth
still can't shut up about it. See, as we all know, Robin confided in
Elizabeth. So much for that. Liz not only blabbed to Patrick, but has been
seen discussing Robin's problems with Matt, Jason and I'm sure the Channel 6
news team will be next. She also can't seem to stop herself from pointing out
that Robin had asked her to "take her place" with Patrick. Stop right there.
You think I didn't notice those big red hearts where your pupils are supposed
to be? You know, I like Elizabeth just fine, but that girl has some serious
man problems. Mainly that she moves from one man to another like she's caught
in a tractor beam or something, whether it ends in romance or not. The person
that really needs to be smacked, however, is Robin, for coming up with this
crazy idea of Elizabeth taking her place, like that would actually go over
well. Robin needs to remember that there is no I in team. And of course, if
Elizabeth were a true friend to Robin instead of walking around acting like
she's all that and a bag of Fritos, then we wouldn't have a story now would
we?
So we see Jax for a few seconds at most, last
sharing a scene with Kate. I was fine with it until Kate kept going on and on
about how Sonny has changed. My mouth was agape as she kept defending the
actions that Sonny took against Jax. Are you for realz lady? Why the hell do
you think Jax went into hiding in the first place? Oh but Sonny didn't know
what he was doing, he was torn up over Brenda. Guess again, Sonny knew
precisely what he was doing and if he was that torn up over Brenda or anyone
else, then maybe he should spend the rest of his life sitting under a weeping
willow tree and weaving a damn basket. Jax should've reached for the nearest
cup of coffee and held it under Kate's nose: Wake up and take a strong whiff
of this.
I do have to wonder why GH is going down the
road of addiction again with a member of the same afflicted family? Lulu
is swigging wine left and right (even with breakfast) and people are starting
to notice that she can't seem to stay away from the swill. Even Maxie called
her out on it. Lulu didn't even blink when Maxie set out about 902 empty
bottles of vino on her coffee table and didn't blame it on her cooking. Lulu
is a drunk, like her daddy before her. She is addicted, like her brother
before her. Who is next, Ethan? We are working the same story while traveling
through the Spencer clan, are we not? I don't know if Lulu is still having
trouble dealing with the fact that being a cop's wife scares the hell out of
her, but I'm guessing yes, she is. Hey, live in the here and now and stop
fretting about woulda, shoulda, coulda. That's Robin's department. And
reaching for the booze when you can't cope is Luke's forte.
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