Monday, 5/18:
"ROSES IN DECEMBER"
- I really
enjoyed the Natalie/Jared scenes today. So often lately, Jared has
been portrayed as nothing more than Natalie's sidekick (similarly,
Charlie is played as Viki's sidekick). The writers forget that these
men are individuals, not just a support system for women. For the
first time in awhile, Jared and Natalie seemed deeply connected and
multi-faceted, rather than a whiny, babbling mess and her sounding
board.
- Nice
repetition of, "After tonight, everything's going to change." The
writers better not be teasing.
- I don't
want to be mean, but I thought Michael Easton was particularly week
over the past few episodes. Today, when John was supposedly "doped
up" and driving while talking to his imaginary friend, I didn't
believe Easton. I didn't believe him last week either when he was
supposed to be poisoned. Maybe he's just never done drugs in real
life so he doesn't know how to portray it? I guess that's looking on
the bright side.
I just read
an interview today of Kassie DePaivia where she says she's 48 years
old. Not that should be considered "old" by any means, but I honsetly thought she was quite younger. She looks AWESOME.
-
What can I say about Susan Haskell that hasn't already been
said? She is perhaps the most emotionally connected actress this
side of Genie Francis. Watching Marty remember her rape and then
everything else was truly riveting.
- I was SO
confused by the locations in this KAD mess. Where on earth did
Powell take Blair and Tea? Supposedly this was the same building as
the frat house? Why is there a frat house, supposedly on the campus
of Llanview University, which also appears to be a) in a ghetto and
b) on the docks? What kind of crack are the writers smoking this
time? This was seriously confounding.
- Also, why
is there a deserted, "boarded-up" frat house still on the campus of
Llanview U? And when was it deserted? Didn't Fish and Kyle go
there just a few years ago?
- If the
boiler room in the ghetto-docks of Llanview University is in the
middle of a college campus during FINALS WEEK (!!!), then why
couldn't anyone hear Tea's LOUD screams?
- Watching
John's thought process as he "figures things out" is dreadfully
boring. It's like watching a turtle race.
- Thank God
Jessica and Brody are out of the closet - but how am I supposed to
believe this news wouldn't travel to Rex quickly enough?
- Kyle Lewis
is a terrible liar and a creepy dude. Let's hitch him up with Stacy
and have them die in a freak boating accident.
- Florencia
Lozano pushed herself to the brink today, telling off Powell and
generally just freaking out. I thought she was going to explode!
- I flipping
LOVED Blair today. One of my favorite Blair days in a long time.
Loved seeing her pissed at Tea before eventually letting her rest
her head on her shoulder.
- Tea:
"You're ripping your designer duds to bandage me?" Blair: "I'm
not doing this for you, bitch."
- Fish
alert! Fish alert! Eh, who cares.
- Okay, Susan
Haskell seriously just gave her Emmy reel for NEXT year. Holy
crap. The vividness of her work is astonishing.
- Why didn't
Tea and Blair try to throw something and break that window instead
of climbing on each other's shoulders? That was dumb.
Tuesday,
5/19: "POWER FAILURE"
- If Viki and
Charlie had to be woken up regarding Chloe going missing, why were
they fully dressed?
- Tea: "I'm
curious about something, seeing as we're going to die in here-"
Blair: "No, I'm not telling you who my hair colorist is. Besides... I'm a natural blond." Tea: "You know, we actually have
a lot in common, Blair." Blair: "Don't make me puke." Ah, this is
true entertainment!
- The
Starr/Jack scenes just melted my heart. That little devil of a boy
isn't all spoiled, yet.
- Was it me,
or did Tea grab Blair's boob when Blair was passed out?
- Second day
in a row with now Gigi or Stacy!!!!!! I'm in heaven!!!!!!!!
- Okay...
that was a HUGE tease regarding Tea's big secret. At least she HAS
a big secret. Blair knows there is something big and I have a
feeling Blair will push to find out what it is and then will have to
decide whether or not to tell Todd. Raise your hand if you still
think Tea didn't have Todd's baby. But why wouldn't she be with the
baby? What else could her secret be?
- Loved the
smoking gun after John shot Powell.
Wednesday,
5/20: "NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART"
- Show opens
with Rex and Gigi. Oh GAWD.
- Doesn't Rex
have to work? Who is paying for Stacy's food? Oh who am I kidding,
Stacy doesn't need food.
- I hated how
long Jared and Natalie stood there like deaf-mutes while Viki,
Charlie, and Clint went back and forth before the truth came out
about Chloe.
- I'm kind of
amazed that the baby switch has actually been exposed! Bravo for
that coming out.
- Marty just
told John she remembers "everything," and John didn't seem to care
at ALL. Is that supposed to be an acting choice, or did someone
just forget to act?
- John, Todd,
and Marty just left Powell bleeding to death.
- Isn't it
funny how Viki and Clint never once wondered how Jessica could have
made it to the hospital as Bess without bleeding to death?
- Todd had NO
reaction to Rebecca being involved or to her lying there on the
floor. Now THAT was a major foible by everyone involved. Todd
would be SHOCKED and affected by Rebecca's involvement.
- I can't
believe Tea's secret didn't come out. What a tease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Llanfair
sure is far away from the hospital - Brody and Jessica have been
driving there for an hour now!
- Jessica is
nuttier than a nasty ol' fruitcake as she remembers the still
birth.
- I will
confess: Part of me still wants Marty and Todd to be together.
It's the actors, folks.
- Everyone
just left Rebecca and Powell. How absurd!
- Poor Brian
Kerwin. He's lucky to get one line per episode. Today he got a
typically buffudled moment as Charlie tried to understand why Bess
would have switched the babies. He comes across as kind of an idiot
sometimes, like a Forrest Gump type.
- I'd like to know how John just materialized a hammer out of thin
air!
- Now HOLD UP
a second! Rebecca is on the main floor of the frat house and she
can hear John talking on his cell phone in the boiler room, yet no
one could hear Blair ot Tea screaming for an hour? Again, this is
supposed to be on a college campus during finals week. WTF?
- Rodi's sure
must have some good health insurance for Gigi, because if my kid
went to the E.R. for eating too much candy, I would make him pay the
bill.
- So...Rebecca (worst return EVER) did all of this because she's "in love"
with Powell, yet when she hears he's dead, she barely had any
reaction. She didn't go to check on him or see the body to make
sure this was true or anything. She just went downstairs to light
her stupid match. Whatever.
- I can't
believe Todd and Marty were driving at the same time as Jessica and
Brody, and the two cars didn't crash! That never happens on a soap!
Thursday,
5/21: "THE WHEELS ON THE BUS"
- Shane is a
loathsome brat, Gigi is a lying bitch, Rex is a gullible dumb ass,
and Stacy is a soulless whore. Remind me... who am I supposed to be
rooting for in this story?
- I loved,
loved, loved the intensity with which Bree Williamson conveyed that
Jessica knows something is very wrong and it has to do with
the baby and everyone else seems to know but won't tell her. It was
justified paranoia at its finest.
- I think
there is a lot of potential in this Blair/Tea bonding angle.
- Viki and
Clint should have had Jessica sedated at the hospital, taken the
baby away, then told her the truth and put her back in St. Anne's.
Hello, Jessica can see that baby grow up - it's her cousin's baby!
- I'm
surprised Marty didn't mention to Viki that her memory came back.
- WHOSE
GLASSES WERE SITTING ON JESSICA'S HOSPITAL BED? How ridiculous!
- My favorite
moment of the week was Bess singing to Chloe. That was soooooooooo
creepy. I love Bess!
Friday, 5/22:
"CLINGING TO HOPE"
-
Are Bess and John/Blair driving during the daytime, or has the sun
just not set yet? Because I thought it was night time?
- Is Rebecca
really dead?
- I can't
believe that Rex isn't annoyed to the point of madness with Stacy
hovering over him and bossing him around every second. She sure is
annoying me.
- Bess: "Seriously, Clint - don't you know I'm smarter than that?" I hope
Bess sticks around for a long time!
- How is it
that Blair is suddenly pining for Todd again? Oh, GAWD!
- You know, I
might actually buy into this Rex/Stacy crap if Rex was portrayed as
being extremely sexually attracted to Stacy from the get go. If he
wanted to have sex with her but resisted out of a sense of morality
or loyalty to Gigi. But instead, it's going down like Rex thinks
Stacy is a great person and he's grateful to her. That makes Rex
stupid, plain and simple. And it makes the storyline unbearable.
- Why does
Kyle have Stacy's cell number memorized!???
- Maybe John
could become a polygamist and Blair and Marty could be sister
wives? It works for HBO!
**MAIL
REPORT**
"I like your
idea of Todd being Schuyler's son, but instead of Rebecca, I would
like Schuyler's mother to be Michelle, the girl who we were told
brought Todd a birthday cake on his 14th birthday (which apparently
lead to Peter Manning doing something especially horrible to Todd
later). Maybe Peter walked in on something more intimate than two
teens enjoying cake together. After finding out Michelle was
pregnant, her parents sent her away, and though she tried to contact
Todd to tell him, Peter threatened both her and Todd to keep her
quiet, and fed her stories about Todd to scare her into keeping
quiet and giving the baby up. This could give us a story about
Todd's past while capitalizing on St. John's and Clifton's
chemistry." - Krista from Philly
Now THIS is
interesting. I had to dig up this story online because my memory had
gotten foggy. So this whole Michelle story came up over ten years
ago, in a scene with Todd and Sam. Tea was around, though, and
facilitated the conversation, so it would make sense for this to
come back into play. Anyway, Todd told Sam that on his fourteenth
birthday, a girl named Michelle came over for cake and they spent
some time together. Peter Manning came home, threw the cake on the
floor, called Michelle names, and abused Todd. Peter used to make
Todd hold his hand over a flame for a minute at a time. On this day
though, Todd fought back and attempted to murder Peter Manning. Sam
rushed in and pulled Todd off; otherwise Todd would have killed his
uncle/adoptive father.
But HERE's
what kind of blows my mind: Todd basically admitted to Sam that
Peter Manning RAPED HIM that night. Now, why is this never brought
up? Todd was raped as a child... hello! That factors into his entire
life and all of the choices he's made since then. Yet we've never
seen a therapy session with this man. Anyway, I think the writers
could have this Michelle girl resurface as Schuyler's mother. There
would be a slightly unbelievable age gap between Schuyler and Todd
if he fathered him at 14 years, but I could overlook it. Todd and
Schuyler need a storyline together, stat. If Schuyler only plays
into Stacy/Gigi, he will not make it as a character. That whole part
of the show will hopefully be cut like the slab of lard that it is.
"I just read
that Catherine Hickland is returning to OLTL; it may be for a brief
visit, but I'm still thrilled to have her back on my screen! Lindsay
has always been my favorite character on the show, and I was really
saddened when TIPTB got rid of the incredibly talented Miss Hickland.
Her return has SO much potential that it's making me actually giddy
to watch the show, which hasn't happened in quite some time. It's
obvious they're bringing her back up to spice up the already red hot
Clint/Nora/Bo triangle. Can you IMAGINE how much hotter it would be
if they threw RJ in the mix as well?! This is how I'd want it to go
down: Lindsay is released from prison. She tries to win Bo back but
notices that he and Nora seem to be gravitating back toward one
another. Lindsay and Clint scheme to keep Bo and Nora apart; RJ
returns to Llanview, and upon seeing that Lindsay is out of prison
(and, of course, no longer with Bo), he tries to woo her back. In
doing so, he tries to push Bo and Nora closer together. Seeing what
RJ is doing, Lindsay confronts him, and the passion in the argument
leads them to have sex. Bo and Nora reunite, and Nora dumps Clint;
Lindsay, who is now convinced she belongs with RJ, tries to comfort
Clint, who has turned to alcohol. Clint and Lindsay end up having
sex, and the two begin a secret strictly-sexual affair, as Clint has
given up on love and Lindsay can't seem to resist him in spite of
having reunited with RJ. When Nora discovers Clint and Lindsay's
affair, she tells RJ, who vows to destroy Clint and Lindsay.
Lindsay, meanwhile, decides to get revenge on Nora for telling RJ.
RJ frames Clint for embezzling, which puts BE in another crisis,
while Lindsay tries to ruin Nora's campaign for... perhaps the
mayoral position? Oh, what I would give to have both Lindsay and RJ
BOTH back! The possibilities are endless!" - Brandon
Oh, I could
not agree more. It's definitely time for Lindsay to get out of jail
and for Catherine Hickland to come home to Llanview. Clint will find
a way to get her released from prison, hopefully. I'd like to see
Clint use Lindsay to keep Bo and Nora apart, but of course that
would backfire. Clint would be exposed and Nora would dump him for
conspiring with Lindsay. Clint would realize though that Nora was
just waiting for a reason to leave him for Bo. Clint could then kick
Bo out of B.E. and make Lindsay his new partner! I'd love to have
R.J. in the mix as well, no doubt. BRING LINDSAY BACK FOR GOOD!!!
"Uh, A.
Martinez? The look on his face!! Forget the farce that is the
Daytime Emmy’s. The way he looked at Lola and then held her in this
almost primal, paternal manner? That there was something James
Lipton couldn’t even fit on his fawning, blue note cards. And then
Robin Strasser in the background with an empathetic glance… Frankly
even Lola high for one eppy was more engaging than weeks of Cole
brooding and/or shouting. His eyes! Martinez hit the perfect note of
utter shock yet managed a believable tenderness. Was awestruck by
the authenticity." - Citizen K
Yes, yes,
yes. What a great moment. You are right, too, that Lola doing drugs
for one episode was better than all of Cole's drug-doing days
combined. Cole on drugs was like... well, it wasn't much different
than Cole not on drugs. Lola on drugs, however, is drama!
"I was
saddened to see that Lola's last show was on Friday. She was
amazing. OLTL's loss for sure. I hate to see the Montez dynamic
gone. I too like everyone else am so tired of the airspace given to
Stacy/Gigi... what a waste." - Glynis
What on earth
were TPTB thinking? They stopped airing Camila Banus right in the
middle of Lola emerging as an actual fleshed-out character. But
don't get me started on the decision to take Ray and Lola out of the
picture. One of the worst choices TPTB have made in a long, long
time. At least they could have wrapped up Lola's storyline before
just pretending she doesn't exist.
"Too bad Stacy
did not decide to be the next Pussycat doll, and leave town with
them."
Gigi, too!
That's it for
this week. Please send your OLTL thoughts, complaints,
suggestions, and desperate pleas to:
Robert Iger, President of Disney (ABC Parent Company)
robert.a.iger@disney.com
Anne Sweeney, President of ABC
anne.x.sweeney@abc.com
Brian
FronsPresident of ABC Daytime
brian.frons@abc.com
Thats it for this week. Thanks for reading', and dont forget to e-mail me.
Happy
Memorial Day, folks! This column is being done in a very hasty
manner, so please excuse me. But the deadline is early this week and
my weekend is crazy, so it's either this or nothing! In a nutshell,
here's what I thought about this week: The revelation about the baby
switch, Marty getting her memory back, and the unusually appealing
bonding between John, Tea, Blair, Marty, and Todd were all
excellent. I was especially taken aback by the Blair/Tea bonding and
the way Todd and Marty seem to function together now that she has
her memory back. Their mutual grandchild is certainly a new
beginning for them. Although I generally love seeing Blair, Marty,
and Tea all bite and scratch at one another, I found it very
refreshing and enjoyable to see them in mutual survival and
admiration mode. The Todd/Marty scenes where Marty recovered her
memory were a thrilling bone to chew on for those of us who were
mesmerized by the Trevor St. John/Susan Haskell chemistry that
carried the show last year only to be thrown away like a used
kleenex. Bree Williamson proved worthy of her Emmy nomination this
week as Jessica's unraveling into Bess captivated me more than any
of her previous work. 
Speaking of
missing in action, it appears that Catherine Hickland is coming back
to the show. But in what capacity? Will this be a prison visit, or
is Clint going to be driven to desperate measures to keep Bo and
Nora apart? TPTB would be very wise to capitalize on Hickland's
awesome power as an actress and use her in this storyline. Clint
and Lindsay set off major sparks during the B.E. storyline and I
could definitely buy a ticket to the Clint and Lindsay show as they
first try to keep Nora and Bo apart before realizing they may be
better off with a reunion of their own. I'll take whatever I can
get of Lindsay Rappaport. 