Admit it. Some of you were kind of digging Ethan because you believed that ultimately he would be discovered to be the son of Robert and Holly. Oh the possibilities. A half brother to Robin. A welcome tie to his royal parents whom we sporadically see. A rogue, like his father before him. Well, close...

I called Ethan on the air time hogger than he is. I even called his scenes with Luke as GH's new bromance. I was actually momentarily interested when Luke insisted that he and Ethan have DNA tests run to see if they are father and son, and Ethan's harsh initial reaction, to say nothing of Tracy's - because I didn't think GH would actually go there. Tracy thinks Ethan is a con artist and I'm thinking the same thing. So now the show is telling us that Luke may have indeed sired this Aussie upstart? Since when?

Ethan clearly states that he is the same age as Lulu, which spells the whole sordid carnage out for us: In the happy and triumphant Spencer family return we saw in 1993, the show now wants us to believe that Luke cheated on his goddess Laura, at the time of Lulu's birth no less, with a character that was barely mentioned (if at all) and this jackass is the result. Some viewers have pointed out the obvious and that is that Luke was on screen that entire time - when did he have a chance to disappear and hook up with Holly? He couldn't have. To imply that Luke would cheat on Laura after all they had been through is insulting, especially in that particular time frame. I've read reports that both Genie Francis (ex-Laura) and FirstLucky Jonathan Jackson had a cow when they heard about this blatant rewrite of Spencer family history. To make matters worse, we also have the time-honored tradition of tampering with test results coming into play so we won't know who fathered what, until Holly comes along and makes the startling announcement. Meanwhile, Luke (with good reason) believes that a little Tracy sleight of hand is playing a role and orders Lulu to flirt with Aussie upstart in order to see Tracy's reaction. Or pure panic. Or both. Nice, Luke, nice. The pimp in you may never die.

So I ask GH, why are you even hinting at such a travesty? Well, we decided that Luke needed the son he wished he had and not a good boy like Lucky, the show could be saying. A son of Luke should not be a cop, the show might say, it doesn't fit in with Luke's anti-establishment way of thinking. No, what you are really doing is making this entire story up as you go along because someone is sporting some major wood over the character of Ethan, if I may be perfectly blunt (if not mortally accurate). And a far-fetched story at that. Ethan as Robert and Holly's kid would've been perfect. But trust GH to go any other way but the right way. And while we're on the subject, toss the scrolls that state that any cute guy that darkens the doorway of this show must be placed with Lulu to see if anything interesting happens.

Next thing we know, the show might decide that Johnny is really Dante. Since this summer is going to focus on Sonny's SORAS'ed kids, hell, what's one more? They have to do something with Johnny, right? As one viewer put it, the show needs to find "someone that Brandon Barash has sexual chemistry with besides the actress playing his sister." Giggle, giggle. And I thought it was just me.