Another week, another column about the mind-numbing boringness that is GH. Sigh. Who must we light a fire under to get this show back on track? There's a few bright spots but they are few and far between.

Let me jump on a few things I noticed last week but couldn't address because I was unable to update. The first one is when Michael's parents were deciding whether or not to continue with his surgery and Claudia screamed something about Jason having his say and wanted to know why. Never mind that Claws really needs to take it down a notch. It's not like she had any real say in the matter. But to answer your question Claws, however unreasonable and shrieking it was presented, it's because - hello! Jason is a blood relative, how quickly they forget. Maybe they didn't forget, maybe they wanted us to listen to Claudia's caterwauling. But yes, Jason is Michael's uncle, via his half brother AJ. Unfortunately, no one bothered to bring that one up. Oh well.

And then there's Olivia. Since when are Olivia and Carly BFF? This is Kate's cousin, Kate being Sonny's ex. A little loyalty to Kate? Yet, there she is, interjecting her own brand of thoughts we don't really want to hear. Is Olivia just a compassionate person? Did she and Carly become pals all of a sudden and I blinked and missed it? Or does she not know what side her bread is buttered on? Couldn't tell you. Perhaps it was out of loyalty to old friend Sonny that she showed so much support for Carly. It didn't make any of it any less baffling. The sad part is that the show seems to be at a loss as to what to do with this character. She has a secret son with Sonny. I don't want to hear about it, let alone watch it, but she has a secret son with Sonny. Having her do little else except play mediator to whatever situation is brewing is a waste.

So Michael is awake and my how he has grown in such a short amount of time. I understand that Michael is going to have it in for Carly, God only knows why, but it's probably the bad choices she has made that rendered him incapacitated in the first place. In the who says irony can't be ironic department, I hear that Michael bonds with the real culprit and that's Claudia. Twisted, twisted, twisted. It actually kind of sucks because we have seen Carly's pain this entire time. She refused to give up on Michael when everyone else was ready to pack it in. She kept the faith and prayed for a miracle, and she got it. To have that same kid turn on her has the potential to be an interesting story if it weren't so cruel. It would make more sense for Michael to shun both parents and Jason because of their mob tendencies, but hey, I don't write this stuff. A long time ago, I suggested Michael be placed in a Jason-in-reverse story, where he brushes off anyone tied to the mob and embraces the Quartermaines. Now that would be entertaining. And who is there when Michael's eyes pop open? Lulu of course. For it is written in the scrolls: If you're young and cute, you must share scenes with Lulu. We don't care if you're a relative. I know they are cousins (second cousins if I'm not mistaken) but Lulu just seemed so out of place to me. Of course, maybe Michael wanted to hear some real answers instead of having two blubbering parents going on and on about how happy they are to see him. In that context, it kind of makes sense that he would wake up and speak to Lulu (someone closer to his own age) first, and hoping she won't whitewash anything.