Oakdale USA is full of children.  Lily and Holden Snyder have Luc, Faith, and Natalie, Jack and Carly Snyder have Parker and Sage, Craig and Rosanna Montgomery have Cabot (at least for now!), and Emily and Hal Munson have Will and Daniel.  Of course, Oakdale being a soaptown, Holden isn't Luc's biological dad, Jack isn't Parker's biological dad, Hal isn't Daniel's biological dad, Emily isn't Will's real mom, and Craig went baby-shopping in Canada and brought home adorable little Cabot.  To make things a little more confusing and a whole lot of fun during family-bonding time, Hal is raising Tom Hughes's biological son Daniel while Tom raised Hal's biological son Adam.  And of course Tom does have another child, Casey, who is apparently at school, camp, or doing his homework in the Hughes attic, because we never see him anymore. 

Little Luc Grimaldi went through some hair-raising adventures as a baby, including being kidnapped by a deranged grandmother.  His half-sister Faith was switched at birth with another child, while baby Natalie had a suprisingly uneventful (translation: boring) conception, birth, and babyhood.  Carly Tenney, under a deadline to have a baby and inherit a lot of money, dazzled Hal Munson into marrying her, then got artificially inseminated to seal the deal she just didn't know that Dr. John Dixon, a sassy reprobate from way back, was himself the proud donor when he inseminated her.  Was little Parker the son of a doctor or a detective?  That red hair was a giveaway, and Hal Munson claimed another son.  Sage was also a player in the 'who's my daddy?' game, with Jack finally claiming parenthood and  Carly and Jack creating a strong little family unit.  Craig, who at first didn't want to adopt a child, realized his wife Rosanna was serious about being a mother, and so Craig did what Craig does best he 'procured' one.  Is the adoption legal?   We're all waiting for the answer to that one.  In any event, these chilren are all doing fine, or as fine as soapkids can do.  But there is one child in Oakdale right now that needs serious, and I'm talking SERIOUS help and that child is William Harold Ryan Munson. 

Will Munson had a pretty much bland childhood, for a soap child.  His parents, Hal and Barbara Ryan Munson, divorced when he was little but they were always there for him, and when they remarried, he was elated.  But Oakdale is a soaptown, and Will's idyllic days were numbered.  His mother Barbara ran off with Craig Montgomery, then she was horribly burned in an explosion.  She wouldn't have a thing to do with her children during this time.  Hal was kidnapped and brainwashed by James Stenbeck around then also, so Will was cared for by his older brother and sister, Paul and Jennifer.   Although his parents both returned to him eventually, Hal married Emily.  So custody of Will was given to his mother, and although Barbara had healed physically, she  was slowly growing mentally unstable.  Will started getting into trouble at school, and became fascinated with fire.  While at the Snyder barn, Will was lighting matches, a fire started, and Will passed out.  He was sure he was responsible for the fire, and spent months in the psych ward.  He eventually remembered that he didn't start the fire, Emily's sister/daughter (don't ask!) Allison started it.  When he was finally released from the hospital, Will asked the judge to give custody of him to his father, and Will moved back with Hal, Emily, and little stepbrother Daniel.  But poor Will's troubles had just begun.

Will is now a young teen caught up in the mess that is Barbara and Paul.  Although Will has a caring father in Hal Munson I mean, come on, who wouldn't love that guy for a father he is so emotionally tied to his mother that I fear he will never escape her crazy clutches.  Barbara is obsessed, and when I say obsessed I mean the woman is totally, 100, stamp-a-looney-sign-on-her-forehead, freakin' crazy about keeping her children bound to her for the rest of their lives.  Barbara wants to break up her older son Paul's engagement to Rose D'Angelo, and she is not above using innocent Will in her nefarious plans.  Will was crushed when he thought his brother was dead, and was overjoyed when Paul returned.  Now Barbara is trying to convince Paul that if he marries Rose and moves to Paris, poor Will's heart will be totally broken again.  So Barbara is using Will  in her pathetic barefaced attempts to keep her children close to her.  She broke into Paul's apartment and sprayed grafitti on the walls, and talked Will into confessing to the crime.  Poor Will was tormented and torn, his desire to please and help his mother colliding with his knowledge of right and wrong. 

Barbara has time and again told Will that he must do anything and everything to keep Paul from marrying Rose, and Will has complied, but you can see in that poor boy's eyes that he is miserable at being used like a poor pawn in a corrupted chess game.  She uses bribes, her stifling love, and Will's vulnerability to manipulate the kid into thinking that his mother needs him desperately, and that without Paul, their family will be irreparably damaged.  I can just picture Barbara at age 75, with her children all sitting around her, all in their 40s and 50s, still the same little pathetic family no growth, no expansion, no healthy development, no lives of their own; just drone-like devotion to that wretched little group that is Barbara Ryan's offspring.

Will Munson needs a normal life.  He needs to be the exception to the rule that soapkids have to suffer.  He is at an age when most soapkids disappear with soap-opera-rapid-aging-syndrome; let's try something new and keep him.  First, let's get him away from Barbara far, far away.  She is a emotional poison cake and one slice too many will turn him into a lifetime psychological cripple.  Next, Will has to realize and accept that his brother is an adult and needs to have his own adult life.  This happens in real life; older brothers and sisters get married and have children, and the little brothers and sisters get to be aunts and uncles. Will should be happy that Paul wants to get married and have a family of his own, and that in the future sister Jennifer will do the same, and even Will himself will fall in love someday.  Third, Will has to realize that there are other adult males in his life who can and will be there for him when Paul leaves.  His own father,  Hal, is a great guy and a wonderful dad!  Hal is loving, fun, fair, a good role model, and dedicated to his kids.  Shoot, wouldn't we ALL love someone like Hal in our lives?  He and Will need to do some good old-fashioned father-son stuff, like camping, going to a movie, bowling (why does Hal strike me as a bowler??), tossing the football around in the yard; Will could even hang out at the cop-shop every once in a while, to see his dad in action tracking down bad guys.   Hal Munson is way underused on the show anyway, he needs to reclaim his son from the dark side that is Barbara.   Finally, Will has been the little brother all his life, but now he has a little step-brother.  It's time for Will to step up and become a good big brother to Daniel.  I know Daniel has an older half-brother in Casey Hughes, but since Casey has been MIA for quite a while (someone please check the Hughes attic!), Will could be the older guiding influence for Daniel. 

So let's hope that Will Munson can still achieve happiness as a normal kid in a soaptown, that he doesn't disappear, contract SORAS, and then reappear as a full grown man.  Let him experience the first pangs of love, his first dance, making the football or soccer team, learning to drive, or having a strong father-son relationship with Hall.  Wouldn't that be a nice refreshing change in Oakdale?                     

And a big PS here, thanks to all you eagle-eyed readers who dropped me a line to set me straight about a mistake in last week's column.  Kim Hughes was not married to Steve Andropolous, she was married to NICK Andropolous!  Boy is my face red!