Blame my own motherhood. Blame my selective but emotionally loyal memory. Or, blame my Libra-in-Venus for seeking fairness, justice, balance in even once-hated antagonists.

I simply will not turn on Alexis Davis/Natasha Cassadine.

I’m sure her critics, enemies (and bosses at ABC Daytime?) might find this hard to believe but ... despite rewriting this former attorney and former voice of reason in the wilderness of mob glorification as an ugly bitchy shrew on her high horse of maternal possessiveness and arrogant self-centered hypocrisy, she’s right to fight for her child, at any cost.

Let’s face it, the odds have been unduly stacked against her from the second head writer Megan McTavish left the building, executive producer Jill Farren Phelps became demoted to figurehead status (so the rumor goes) and co-head writer Bob Guza returned to his post, bringing Melrose Place partner Charles Pratt – and a decidedly misogynistic passive-aggressive methodology – with him.

She went from enjoying a Sexis friendship, one-night stand and maybe even a long-term romantic adult relationship—the only redemptive factor in Sonny, the mobster, who took back a hit on A.J. for her—to faking DID, covering up a murder, letting others be falsely accused, using a smitten psychologist to aid in her fraud, posing as a male butler and finally, coming back to her Cassadine family, specifically Stefan, to use any means necessary to retrieve her daughter, Kristina.

Instead of rightly going to the cops, explaining her innocence by using perfectly legitimate, perfectly provable self-defense, and being allowed to raise her baby girl as a single mother with a world of possibilities, or better yet, as suggested by Eye on Soaps’ gossip columnist, Sage, letting Ned and Jax in on the labor pains, heavy on the slapstick with the tension... Alexis has to play the villain from every angle, while Ned and Cameron bend over backwards to make allowances for her, Skye misbehaves uncharacteristically as a gleeful baby-stealing c**t, Scott furthers his ill-conceived, newly-minted role as the town shithead for shithead’s sake, a lone token Latina judge serves with malicious corrupt bias aforethought.

Gee, that’s not a set-up at all!

Want more evidence of a conspiracy theory against intelligent, strong women who speak up for intelligent, strong, pro-women storylines?

Ned convinces Scott to back off on the arrest, allowing Alexis visitation, with a little blackmail thrown in for good measure, he agrees, and instead of thanks, Guza & Co.’s designated bitch rips into Ned as an unwanted interloper, reminding him that Kristina is her baby by blood and she never wanted him to be the father or come to her defense. Cameron gets stabbed in the back next at the Port Charles Grill over drinks, when he flat-out tells Alexis that she’s an ungrateful bitch, and in response, she puts on her ungrateful bitch expression and promptly dumps her glass of booze over his head, smirking afterward. Every time Skye seems to open up about her own lack of reproductive skill, Alexis uses that opportunity to show absolutely no compassion, or empathy, whatsoever, just more acid on an open wound. Big Alice alerts Alexis to Kristina’s problematic crying and hospital destination, Alexis goes off and confronts Skye, badgers Bobbie, holds Kristina, looks the designated bitch some more at Skye, begs Cameron for help, completely forgetting her earlier bar insult, attacks him when he won’t and storms off in a huff.

The only times Alexis is given her side to tell are few and far between, interacting with baby Kristina, once listening to Emily talk about her breast cancer fears, and as spoilers indicate, struggling with second thoughts about icing Ned out of the picture.

Not nearly enough to keep fans satisfied, as one by one, they fall to the wayside, hating Alexis and wanting her off GH permanently. Isn’t this TPTB’s fondest dream and modus operandi, to drive a particular actor away by making life on the set and on the screen difficult to impossible, using character assassination? Brad Maule (Tony) said as much about his own character’s downward spiral into backburner nothingness to AMC PV Post columnist Amanda in her July 18^th interview.

Funny how that doesn’t work on me, and I’m far from an Alexis fan by any means. I’ve gone on record against her throughout the years, since she first showed up in 1996 by bonking Luke on the head for trespassing on Spoon Island, her histrionics with Jax in the Sahara, her histrionics with Luke over Kat Splat, her histrionics with Ned leaving him at the alter, her histrionics with Sonny during the Sexis interlude.

She can be a bit extreme in her liberalism, as inserted by extreme liberal portrayer Nancy Lee Grahn—fond of kissing Clinton ass at every opportunity, and yes, a bit extreme in her closed-minded, tunnel-vision painfully obvious to everybody but her highness pot meet kettle, nowhere else but in the custody issue. It’s okay for her to keep Kristina away from her biological father Sonny because he’s a mobster, but not okay for A.J. to want his biological son away from Sonny because he’s a mobster? I could also do without her eye-rolling, lip-pursing condescension for the little people every single time the potential for shared empathy comes along (to be fair, this has been going on before Guza and the boys came back to town).

But in Kristina’s case, despite what’s written, I’m on Alexis’s side all the way. She is that little girl’s rightful mother. Mothers have absolute rule over their bodies, their choices and their custody; yes, even over rightful fathers. Mothers have to multi-task, always keeping in mind what’s best for their children, tending to every boo-boo, sickie and constant whine. They’re there from morning to night, changing diapers, cajoling meals, giving baths, encouraging first walks, talks, climbs and reasoned thoughts, staying up nights, reading bedtime stories, checking in on sleepy heads, worrying, fretting, unconditionally loving, while the men go to work, go to gigs, go to parties, go to spur-of-the-moment lunches at the Cheesecake Factory or do nine rounds of golf with buddies and maybe stroll in for a five-minute hello before asking about the kid’s next naptime.

So fuck me if I don’t give a fuck what Ned, Cameron and Christ Himself have done for Alexis’s benefit, or why Skye is so fucking hell-bent on appropriating another woman’s baby for her own. All the crocodile tears in the world over an empty womb, a lost opportunity or simply a man’s attraction for a stubborn willful woman, or behind-the-scenes directives, will not change that fact.

Kristina always belonged with Alexis. Despite the Alcazar murder rap, the DID baggage, the Dobson farce, the uncharacteristically self-destructive moves forced upon a once-intelligent, insightful, infuriatingly singular willful and strong woman’s woman.

I should be here ranting and raving about Alexis’s single-mother storyline, involving as many of the vets and newcomers as possible, and breaking new ground in soaps. Not mourning another loss at the hands of TIOC who’d rather Alexis look wrong than Alexis look real.

FEEDBACK [“Don’t sun on my parade”]

Good Lord, people, so many e-mails and column mentions about last week’s FWIW, from GH viewers of all ages and backgrounds. Every time I don’t think twice about something I’ve written, it comes back in accolades. Much appreciated. Out of so many outstanding reads, I’ve pulled two that spoke especially to my heart, and gee whiz, they’re in the youth demo:

Lynx: This 27-year-old agrees with you! Coggie, let me assure you that not all Gen X-ers or Y-ers (my birth year makes me the baby of one and the old maid of the other, so pfft) want the over-30 crowd to make like Cocoon and fly away. I have been watching for 20 years, thanks to my grandmother and babysitter, neither of whom thought this was inappropriate for a kid. I remember crying my eyes out over Jenny's death on AMC; wondering just who's side GH's Anna Devane was really on; Tina giving birth to CJ on OLTL in the jungle, even though she wasn't showing; and my brother defending JR Ewing at every turn on Dallas Friday nights while I waited for Sue Ellen to sober up and get the dirty dog. I revel in soap history. I HATE it when TIIC ignore it, not only because it is a slap in the face to long-time viewers and actors, but because often it's bad writing! Characters should not stay the same by any means, but changes in them should be the result of a natural progression in their learning curve (or being thrown from your brother's car into a tree). Falling in love should be a journey, whether from hatred to love, friendship to romance, shared pain to shared happiness, etc. It should not be an executive seeing two characters in a chance scene, deciding that they are a super couple, and pulling them away from their love interests and into each other's arms in a two-week period. 

Characters also should not exist in a vacuum with only two or three other characters. Sure, there are hermits in real life, but do we want to watch them? How much richer would Carly's predicament be (focusing on GH from now on since that is the point of FWIW) if her mother and twice-recast-so-can-we-use-him brother were involved? Screw that, how much richer would GH be if Bobbie had her own storyline? Why are we ignoring the chemistry she and Stefan shared once in a storyline that was cut short in a failed attempt to recapture another show's magic with Stefan and Katherine's portrayers? Why did we get rid of Jerry Jacks, who was awesome with Bobbie? Why not have Jax return with his brother and find a way to beat the Feds' charge against Jerry? Heck, Sonny and Jason do it all the time.  Why on earth wouldn't TPTB want to bring back Lucy? She could mix it up with anybody! And she is a prime example of character progression. Lucy went from being a low-down man-stealing heifer to a loving surrogate mother devastated by the deaths of children she either raised or tried to carry to term to a survivor who forced the world to take her seriously and turned her enemies into her friends. It took years, but it happened, and it all made sense. Have her rescue Scott from cartoon-villain purgatory. Return Deception and its spa to her, and fix the mess left by Laura and Carly. Get her involved with finding holistic approaches to cancer so she can help the daughter of her second-favorite ex-husband. Lucy and Stefan, Lucy and Coleman, Lucy and practically anybody. And please let the woman give Alexis a makeover. I think they are deliberately putting Nancy Lee Grahn in as horrible lighting as possible. After said makeover, tell Alexis to go reclaim her man... Jax! If there weren't so many baby stories on now, I'd vote for Monica and Alan to have that baby she was considering some time ago. Quite a few children are born to shocked menopausal women. What family could better play up the highs and lows of such a risky venture? And may I ask where oh where are Simone and Tommy Hardy? Last I checked, they never moved out of the Brownstone. That's more family for Audrey and Elizabeth. And doesn't Port Charles have an Asian Quarter (which could use a new name as well as a comeback)?

I'm sorry I went on for so long. I just wanted to show that not all of us 20-somethings are razzle-dazzled by Guza & Pratt's latest offerings. I also want a respect for history (including with Sonny and Jason Morgan's pre-2002 characters - they were true brothers before this whole jump/how high crap), generation integration, and darn it, some good stories!

Jennifer: Fantastic column. Hi Coggie, thank you for your column. Your opinions regarding GH mirror my thoughts exactly--the breast cancer story, the new vs. the vets issue, older fans vs. newer fans, etc. I'm deeply troubled by the direction the show has taken on so many fronts. I've been watching for nineteen years, since I was in my early teens, and I have never been so frustrated. I don't like a single storyline right now. The show used to have something for everybody, but now it's awash in dark, misogynistic, and downright irresponsible storylines. I won't touch on everything that is making me ill about this show because it would take me ten pages to convey every thought. I will add that when I read about people saying 'get with the times,' who cares about the vets, etc., I'm flummoxed. When I started watching soaps, I was six or seven and I would watch them with my mother. I was interested in characters of all ages and that interest continued through my teen years, into my twenties and now into my thirties. Generations, families, characters from all walks of life and circumstances are the backbone of good soap storytelling and I have known that intuitively since I began watching daytime television. As Sage said, soaps should serve their entire audience, not a 'target' audience and that is the reason that soaps have survived for so long. It's possible to move with the times while also maintaining that golden rule. I fear for the future of GH if those who run it don't remember this soon.

Was it something I said?






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